At Least It's Only Once a Year...

christmas sucks for me. always has, and i don't totally understand it. it always makes me sad and depressed. i figured that this year would be different since i would be with the man i planned on spending my life with. yeah, well... since that's not happening, it's turning into the worst holiday season ever. i'm ridiculously depressed, obviously, and there's just no getting out of it. and as much as i love my family - and i really do - there's just no way i'm going to be able to function around all the holiday crap and family stuff. i had a minor breakdown on thanksgiving, and that family didn't even belong to me. (sorry about that, c... but thanks for dealing with me!) so, i will be spending christmas with the bff. i'm flying down to ft. lauderdale on christmas eve (i know, i know, but it was $50-100 cheaper than any other day) and we will be enjoying christmas on miami beach. christmas dinner will be at benihana's. it will be our very non-christmas-y christmas. he can't be with his family as he has to work the day before and after, and christmas really isn't his thing either... plus, we've both had a seriously crappy year, so hopefully this will be good for both of us. we'll see. i totally expect to become a big blubbery mess at some point, but hopefully i'll manage to wait till i'm not in public. we'll see. all i know is that he's my bff for a reason, so hopefully we'll make each other feel better...